Let’s be real. You’ve been staring at the Google doc for 45 minutes.
Okay, you write something for five mins then scroll for 20 mins.
Then write for 2 mins. Impulsively pick up your phone (for the 50th time) for 5 mins.
Get thirsty. Get bored.
Get an Amazon package delivered…
And *POOF!* all the joy + urgency left your fingertips.
Me: Can we get even realer!?
You: YES YOU CAN!
This didn’t just happen today.
This has been happening for days. Weeks even?!
(Dare I say months? bbbuuuuurrrrnnnnnnn)
But then Miss. Rona reared her ugly head. Thrice.
The US just realized (🙄) it has a WHOLE ASS race problem.
(that’s a whole ‘nother offer…)
And no-one knows what day it is.
All this probably makes it *stupid* hard to feel like a money-making “winner winner taco dinner” when you haven’t changed your carnitas-stained Nirvana tee in three days.
OK. Maybe I’m being too hard on ya.
Maybe, just maybe, you got to publishing that landing page.
Copy, stock photos, and a glaring buy button for all to see.
Emails sent to the list.
Posts posted to the gram.
Facebook Live done. And done.
You wait. And then: WTF!?!? 🦗🦗🦗
You were gonna get someone to look at it.
Ya’ know, what’s her-face in your mastermind, right?!?
Her copy’s ALWAYS on point.
But ugh. You keep forgetting to shoot her the Google Doc.
And you did just ask to pick her brain last week…
Then “FEEHCK! Why am I like this?” starts creeping in
“I should’ve had that sales page up weeks ago. UGGGH!!!”
That masterclass teased and outlined days ago.
That offer buttoned up and ready for launch a month ago.
And then follow-up emails.
Oy, don’t get you started on the emails.
Matter of fact you have three courses collecting dust in Kajabi that could totally solve all of this.
But that also means blocking a day and a half to scour the modules.
Then the swipe files for the perfect framework.
All for nada because you still don’t know how to make it your own.
Either way you’re looking to launch THAT NEXT thing.
The thing that’s gonna give you all the freedom and visibility to attract clients on repeat.
And do all the selling for ya. (or at least make selling easy peasy Bahama breezy)
But you can’t seem to get past the succulent prez templates and rose gold paper clip stock photos to make your THING your own.
Or the five coworking sessions you signed up for (and missed).
Or the two $27 “Launch + Layback” email templates you bought off Insta.
And now you’re this close to hanging up your launch hat and buying out the aisle of ramen (spicy shrimp + lime pls!) to hunker down for fall.
I mean you know what good copy, good offers, good “You had me at hello!” content looks like.
You just don’t know where to 🤬 start or how to 🤬 finish your own.
…A second pair of eyes (and a second brain) you can call on without feeling icky or fearing being judged for not having your shit together.
And def not another mastermind where the call time is smack in the middle of every client call EVER.
YOU. JUST. NEED. SOMEONE. TO. TELL. YOU. WHAT 👏🏼 TO 👏🏼 DO 👏🏼
WHERE TO DO IT. WHAT TO SPICE UP.
AND HOW TO DO IT.
And I can help you turn a whole vibe + your words into 💵 💵
You see, I’m all about helping you write copy that sounds like you talk and makes people want what you got. It’s my schtick.
I’m the copywriter (and marketing coordinator) for your favorite brands, favorite copywriter.
Yes, I’m coming out from behind the curtain and spilling the tea on how to make your copy pop + convert.
I’ve helped service providers, like Samar Owais, launch the course they’ve been avoiding like the plague.
And when I say we bootstrap launched…
WE BOOTSTRAPPED LAUNCHED, CHILE!
(You don’t have to be Amy Porterfield with 8 billion funnels + 100 people strong team)
Her first launch. Her way.
A Google doc + some emails.
And Samar nailed her first 5 figure launch (actually her first launch ever) out the gate.
Or like everyone’s favorite Aussie👇🏼 , Belinda Weaver of CopywriteMatters
From 0 member free community to 500 engaged member FB group in 2 weeks (all organic, grass fed traffic), with 6-months worth of training, FB lives, and repurposed content ready to go… and nurture like a mother.
A project she admitted she would have pushed off until next year if we didn’t work together to map out all in “doing the least for the most [impact]” phases.
And a launch funnel mapped + nailed — all from a 90-minute jam sesh.
WE DID THAT! 🎉
Now she’s my favorite Pocket CMO client.
But like these lovely bosses, you don’t have to book me for a 6-month retainer, or 6-week launch, or even a 1-day intensive…yet.
Get what you need, NOW, to get your gorgeous idea into the world and out of your phone notes in just 60-minutes….
Get your copy zhuzhed or your content slayed to the ride or buy gawds in one hour for just $297 plus your virtual to-go cup filled with:
🥳 The only Zoom recording you’ll ever playback
🥳 A chat debrief + transcript with action items (in case you don’t play it back)
🥳 Tangents turned Taglines
🥳 Rants turned About Me’s
AND if you want this baby out the door and ready for UPLOAD ASAP then UPGRADE to HAPPY HOUR VIP for $749.99
(only $297 to book):
ALL OF THE ABOVE PLUS👇🏼
🥳 You’re very own Copy By Numbers Emails, Sales Page, Home Page or About Me (pick one) template
🥳 Annotated Transcript so you know what’s what
🥳 Content Ideas (that easily can be turned into offers)
🥳 All my “I gotta swipe file for that” and “here’s your copy-by-the-numbers inspo, right here” and the classic “remind me to connect you with so-and-so” biz-bestie intros
(option to pay in full, in 2 or in 4 monthly payments of $187.50 for the whole she-bang)
You: Swerve the PITAs, find my voice, zhuzh my copy, my offers and get paid TO BE 200% MY WHOLE SELF!” 👇🏽
Also You: “Basically you’re telling me I can get my WHOLE life in 60-mins?!?”
Me: YUP – if that means getting a second pair of 👀 on your sales page will give you the permission to launch that 💩 already. And make sure your Stripe goes awf!
Also Me: YUP – if that means you can talk for days but when you get to the keyboard your words chuck up the deuce sign – I can help you fix that.
Me Again: YUP – if you’ve been meaning to launch that course or membership but don’t know where to start – we can map out a “doing the least” game plan so you can make the most – FAST.
You: $297 ya say? BOOP! (that’s you hitting the big o’ BOOK button)
Q: What can we REALLY get done in an hour? And how much is this gonna run me?
A: Good question. Here’s a little taste of what we can make work in an hour. Choose your adventure from one of…
Get your sales page or opt-in once (or twice) over-ed with LIVE edit commentary + comments built for swoon worthy copy.
Werk out a mini step-by-step launch plan (aka roadmap) for your next masterclass, membership, or course so you can secure the bag asap.
Zhush up a few of your batched emails and nurture sequence subject lines for sick open rates and effortless engagement.
Spilling all the tea on an offer you’re thinking up and brainstorming all the angles, market fit, and validation content + engagement you need to get that puppy to sell itself.
Nailing the eff out of your brand voice + tone (yes in an hour) by getting the skinny on how to write like you speak + nailing your audience’s love language.
What can’t I do in an hour?
Q: I don’t drink booze — can I still hop on the call with you? Will that be weird?
A: Nope, not weird at all. Actually, I ask what you’re sipping on these days when you sign up — particularly on the day we meet so I can match your drink vibes. Mocktails… Tea… Horchata… it’s all good.
Q: What if I don’t have any copy yet? Can I use this hour to work through some stuff?
A: No copy? No problem. We can chat about your offer, your ideal customer, some ideas for podcast pitches or guest posts. We can nail down a basic outline of a landing page — but we’d likely only get to one maybe two of those things. See the “what we can accomplish” bit above for what we can (and can’t) do in the first Q.
Q: WOW! $297 for an hour call!? Where’d you get that number?
A: Great question. It comes down to three things: Value + Peace of Mind + Commitment.
1) The value of my time, and yup, your time too.
I wanted to make getting you a HUGE ROI with as little time + money commitment as I could. My day rates start in the 4-figures. My retainers in the 5-figures. This offer makes getting your genius + message tight; out into the world and quick AF.
2) The peace of mind that comes from knowing that YOU now know what your copy needs…. and having an awesome and totally doable plan to get it done? PRICELESS
3) The commitment I have to giving you as much as I can to help you achieve your goal is siick. Also it’s about the commitment you have in yourself to execute that shit. So yeah, you spend an hour on the call but I spend another 90 minutes making sure you’re HOOKED UP!!!! 🤩
4) Real tho: Need an extended payment plan? Or some way to work it out? 💩 is real, FOMO’s not. Holla @ me here
Q: What if I don’t quite know that’ll need VIP, can I book a reg Happy Copy Hour sesh and upgrade later?
A: Absolutely! You have until I deliver the goods to change your mind. You can literally decide on the call. And don’t worry, you don’t need to remember a thing cuz I’ll ask ya — and if it doesn’t seem like a good fit I’ll let you know.
You gonna keep psyching yourself out, then back in, then back out again, and let another fabulous offer or idea sit on the shelf?
You gonna let another blank Google doc stare you and the face talking about : “you ain’t poppin’ and you ain’t got nothing to say”??? (umm Maury + me concluded that was a LIE)
You gonna keep telling yourself you can’t afford a dope copywriter or consultant because you ain’t got it like that (ummm hello right here!!!👋🏼)?
Or are you finally gonna be down for your badass self and get help at a price (and timeframe) you can TOTALLY AFFORD?
“Sometimes, no matter how much (or what kind of) personality you’ve got, you get to a point where you want to make sure your audience knows you know, they know what you’re talking about, ya know? It takes skill and guts to go against the grain and speak your truth especially in business. Christina is like the tweeter and the woofer, dialing up the volume of your voice to bring out the richest qualities while keeping messages concise, clever, and crystal clear.”
“Working with Christina has been one of the most efficient and fun experiences I’ve ever had with a content creator! She is thorough, attentive and brilliant. Christina is a self-starter and has a real talent for beating deadlines. What I love most about working with Christina is she is amazing at hearing my ideas, even when they are all over the place, and creating engaging, succinct, and creative content that always has my brand’s culture in mind. You can’t teach that. Would I work with her again? Well, we haven’t stopped working together yet and I don’t plan on it!”
“She’s got a knack for pinpointing exactly what you need to hear — whether you’re launching a new product, improving your business systems or just dealing with mindset issues. In just our first convo, she gave me a pro tip that’s helped me level up my writing process and book two new clients in the last month. And best of all, she’s just awesome to talk to. If you’ve got the chance to work with her, it’s a no-brainer.”